I was the toast of two continents: Greenland and Australia
I'm not into character assassination, except my own.
I love talking about nothing. It is the only thing I know anything about.
What we want is a story that starts with an earthquake and works its way up to a climax.
I'm a Hollywood writer, so I put on a sports jacket and take off my brain.
The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill.
Reading of any kind is on the decline. Half the American people never read a newspaper. Half never vote for President. One hopes it is the same half.
If I were running the world I would have it rain only between 2 and 5AM. Anyone who was out then ought to get wet.
Some of my plays peter out and some pan out.
The exclamation mark is the literary equivalent of a man holding up a card reading LAUGHTER to a studio audience.