Colin Bowles

Why not give your son a motorcycle for his last birthday?

Dave Barry

An apostrophe is used mainly in hand-lettered small business signs to alert the reader than an "s" is coming up at the end of the word.

If you live to be one hundred you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.

James Stewart

If I had to do it all over again, I would do exactly the same things, although maybe a little quicker.

Jean Kerr

I don't want to see the uncut version of ANYTHING.

There are basically only two types of exercise in Hollywood: jogging, and helping a recently divorced friend move.

Don't try to make children grow up to be like you or they may do it.

I'm an ordinary sort of fellow, 42 around the chest, 42 around the waist, 92 around the golf course, and a nuisance around the house.


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