Dominic Cleary

A doctor is the only person without a guaranteed cure for a cold.

The trouble with a lot of songs you hear nowadays is that somebody forgot to put them to music.

Engelbert Humperdinck

I'm in a class by myself, along with people like Rod Stewart.

Chico Marx

He's got a bad case of insomnia and he's trying to sleep it off.

I've got a friend who's a procrastinator; he didn't get a birthmark until he was eight years old.

Johann Sebastian Bach

There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the instrument plays itself.

Harold Nicolson

One of the minor pleasures in life is to be slightly ill.

Artur Schnabel

The secret of my piano playing is that I always make sure that the lid over the keyboard is open before I start to play.

Lord Bethell

The European Community is being run in a thoroughly un-British way.

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