If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards.

Bruce Barton

When you're through changing, you're through.

Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter.

Beryl Pfizer

I write down everything I want to remember. That way, instead of spending a lot of time trying to remember what it is I wrote down, I spend the time looking for the paper I wrote it down on.

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.

Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well.

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